Sunday, August 31, 2008


Every time Merdeka comes around, i always have this tingling feeling from the past. I always have this picture in my head where my whole family and I cuddled together in front of the television early 31st morning to watch the parade celebrating our nations independence. Even though today I have yet to re-live that memory the smell of that day stayed.

I always thought that Merdeka was just another bad excuse to celebrate something. "Melayu itu kuat temasyanya, walaupun sudah tergadai tanah" - Usman Awang. Over the years i have realized that it is more than just a celebration. It is more than just a day to be happy about, more than that, it is a day to remember. A day that should serve as a reminder to all of what the nation had went through in order to give us the gift of independence. The fathers others have lost, the mothers others have lost, the brothers, the sisters, the sons and the daughters, the tears, the sweat, the hands that hold the warm bloodied body on the battle field slowly losing its warmth succumbing to death. The frustration of having told that your nation is not ready to govern itself, the agony of writing over and over again on a blank piece of paper "Give Us Freedom".

Freedom....... Give us our independence....

For those who have forgotten here is a reminder. Freedom is to make our own choices, to govern our own nation, to live our lives the way we want to...

Freedom is the right to breathe.....

So many have died for that right.... so many have died for our right to live.

Selamat Menyambut Kemerdekaan
Selamat Hari Jadi Malaysia

Because they fought for the future, we will remember the past.
Remember how passionately they loved this nation we call....

Friday, August 29, 2008

Our Life, On the Line

My new addiction!!!

What’s a plurk?
A plurk is the new social journal. The new “in” thing. =D

It’s not a game. It's nothing like Myspace, Friendster and Facebook. No no no.

It’s like a shout out message. Something like usual existing chat box but the only different is plurk is cooler. You don’t scroll down, but you move horizontally.

Every message can get a response. It’s like you are giving one sms to the whole world and then get many replies. =)

So Plurk is a small message that you can broadcast to the world, your buddies or just yourself over the web, through instant messaging, and through text messaging on your mobile phone. You showcase your everyday happenings on the timeline.

There is also plurk widget where u can embed on your blog. You can see mine and Seth’s here in our sidebars of this blog. =)

What’s the main benefit of joining plurk?

You will get karma points! The more response you give to other’s plurk, the more karma points you will collect. However, if you do bad thing like spamming others or u get rejected when u friend request others, then your karma points will be decreased.

  • Plurk as stalkerati central: People + Lurk = Plurk
  • Plurk as an amalgam of Play + Work: Play-Work. Plurk is what scientists do. It is the enthusiastic, energetic application of oneself to the task at hand as a child excitedly plays; it is the intense arduous, meticulous work of an artist on their life-long masterpiece; it is joyful work.
  • Plurk as acronym: Peace, Love, Unity, Respect, Karma
  • Verb potential: “Oh I googled this –> Oh I plurked it” Easy enough to wrap around in any form. Plurked, plurking, plurkers, plurks. Little p, big P, it’s catchy, snippy and sweet.

  • Apa lagi, jom lah join plurk!!

    Click here to join. =)

    p/s: It is P.L.U.R.K. bukan Peluk. =P
  • Wednesday, August 27, 2008

    A life experience

    Everyday we go through life meeting people, doing things, saying things, looking at things and breathing. Without realizing though that all of the things we do everyday changes us slowly. We change everyday by the things we say and the things that are said to us. But more importantly everyday we almost never experience or show anyone a gesture to induce change.

    I have always been a firm believer that changes happens slowly. In an effort to change the world, we must first begin to change one person, and that person will in exchange change another person and another and another. And these changes will one day affect the world.

    So how do we change the world? how do we make the world fall in love with each other.....

    Here's how i see it... once during a rainy day, i was wet out of my clothes by i had a flat tire and of course like any drama would suggest, i had to be somewhere and i had to be there soon. So i stepped out of my car in the pouring rain and started to change my tire. The rain poured so heavily that my visions were bothered by it. My hands we slippery and made it all the more difficult to change a tire. but i kept trying... then suddenly, from the corner of my eye, i saw a car pull over in front of my car. Now i dont know whether it was instinct or bad common sense, my first reaction was to grip my wrench tighter. Like i was sure i was gonna be mugged. Out came a man around my age (i was 20 then) and he came running to me and said

    "need some help buddy??"

    at that moment, my grip loosened and i nodded. So we spent the next 45 minutes trying to unloose bolts strengthen by a powertool and all this by force of two people. And we did, i didnt have any money so i offered him a cup of coffee and a warm meal to say thanx. He obliged and we went for lunch at a nearby mamak stall. and to my suprise we had a lot in common. but this is what he said that stuck

    "I dont know actually why i stopped, i just have this obsession to believe in humanity. I want to believe that after all the shit the world has gone through, there are still people in this world worth helping. Worth taking your time to get to know. Worth your effort. I stopped not because i wanted to help you, i stopped because i wanted assurance that humanity is still kind. That chivalry is not dead. Doing you a favor, was in turn, doing myself a favor. It allowed me to believe that the only reason people are scared of each other is because they refused to lend a hand. The only reason we fight is because we refuse to reach out. I had stopped and spent my time helping you, but in return, i found a friend and more importantly,i had a glimpse of how humanity can survive in this cruel world that we have created ourselves. In doing you a favor, i did humanity a favor. In this world we just need the courage to say "need some help?" "

    he sipped his drink and continued

    "Who knows maybe next time.... You'd stop to save humanity..." he grinned....

    A couple of years after that.. i was driving down a rainy road when i saw a car stop by the side of the road and at that moment i remembered him. I remembered those small steps he took from his car to mine, his helping look, his clam smile and most of all his favor. I thought to myself, why not.... lets at least try to save humanity. So i stopped the car and i ran towards the vehicle, a red proton saga. And as i grew closer, i saw a girl in the car and she seemed scared. Only natural i guess. I tapped on the window and she looked at me scared. I asked her to roll down her window a bit... and i took out my wallet and three my ic in. and i said

    "i just wanna help..." she picked up my IC, pondered for a while and lowered her window...

    "flat tire..." she said....

    I smiled and said to her....

    "Need some help??" trying to imitate the guy who helped me...

    She smiled and nodded....

    Every day we are changed by the things that happen around us. We are given the oppurtunity everyday to try and make the world a better place. And we dont realize it. Sometimes, when i tell people this story, they would say, "What if you were mugged or robbed when you tried helping that girl?" and i would tell them what the guy told me...

    The only reason we are afraid of people and each other today is because we refuse to lend a hand, because we refused to reach out... because we refused to say "need some help?"

    Saying "need some help?" as trivial as it may sound.... might just help to save humanity....

    He changed me, and im pretty sure the girl i helped walked away that day thinking, chivalry is not dead. She and i will have realized that humanity is not lost... humanity can be saved... if we only said

    "need some help??"

    Tuesday, August 26, 2008

    Happy Birthday Syirah!!

    Today is my younger sister's birthday!!
    she is sixteen now.
    oleh kerana birthday dia jatuh pada hari dia di asrama
    dan dia tak boleh nak bawak handphone
    maka dengan rajinnya dier telah telefon semua ahli keluarga
    nak tuntut ucapan happy birthday.
    hee hee~

    Dear Syirah,
    if ur reading this...
    (i know ur gonna have to read this coz i'm gonna ask you to. haha.)

    Happy 16th Birthday!!!
    too bad u have to celebrate it at school...
    but from my experience,
    it's a way more fun celebrating it there
    with friends and admirers and boyfriend
    to give you chocolates and gifts and perhaps bears?

    Belajar rajin rajin kamu!!
    Jgn asyik kawad or basketball je!!
    ketawa tu jgn besar besar. nanti muke makin panjang!!

    Selamat Hari Lahir again.
    Semoga panjang umur murah rezeki
    dikurniakan akal yang sempurna
    berjaya dunia dan akhirat
    don't do something i wouldn't do.

    even though u
    has no pimple just yet,
    taller than me
    fleshier than me
    better in kitchen than me
    i am still ur big sister and
    i am cuter than you

    this post is my gift for you.
    i love you.
    i do.
    take care.

    Wednesday, August 20, 2008


    : that's the word for it, but sometimes you pick someone for your rebound that is a little too compatible, and then you are stuck. Your 'fling' turns into a full-blown relationship, and you are in love, all over again, except with all the baggage of not quite being over the last one, and not quite being ready for this new one, and hey, weren't you supposed to spend sometime alone, you know, really getting to know yourself and re-establishing your autonomy so that you wouldn't just make the same mistakes again?

    Oh well.

    I ask, "Why do boys go out with crazy girls?"

    He answers, "Guys go out with crazy girls until they get tired of taking it. Then they find a new girl."

    "One that's less crazy?"

    "Not necessarily."

    "One that's crazy in a different way?"

    "Maybe. Mostly just one that's new."

    "But what if she's crazy in the same way?"

    "Even if she's crazy in exactly the same way, it's not the same girl."

    "And that's enough?"

    "That's enough."

    My friends wrote their own wedding vows. She promised to love him, told him many sweet things. His reply was one sentence long:

    "I promise to love you no matter how crazy you get."

    That's enough, isn't it?


    Far Away

    I'm stressed.
    I'm worried.

    I believe I can do it.
    A or not.
    I care no more.

    Right now.
    I miss you.

    Thursday, August 14, 2008

    Monthly Summary

    This past few weeks (since mid july to mid august) has truly been a roller coaster ride and if you have been wondering, currently i am at my lowest. Im not one to whine but it sucks sometimes, the high points include my Summer being with me for like a few weeks, feels days, i wish i could keep her longer... wait let me rephrase that... i wish i could keep her forever :D (dah dah berenti senyum kamu tu... nampak taring) hehe....

    Work has been hectic, i never knew how similar a researcher and a kuli batak are. The only difference is that a kuli batak gets paid 800 and a researcher gets paid 900. I come home tired almost everyday. But i have this weekend to look forward to. Mama kata kalau banyak benda tak elok jadi it means something good and great is going to happen for you. *i wish it happens this saturday!!!*

    Im whining and rambling, by the end of the day, i kinda like my working world with my summer with me. I would work and she would bother me occasionally and then she'd say "Ok lah taknak kacau daddy keje... i love you byeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee" to be honest i could imagine the two little "tarings" that comes a light when she smiles (I am seriously honest when i say i love your tarings hehe)

    hari tu masa mama datang for my convocation, i reported to my mother... "mama tgk sab ni mama.. dia nak cabut taring dier..."

    Mama kata (ehem ehem) "eh kenapa??? kan manis ader taring tu... itu orang panggil taring pemanis... nanti takde taring dah tak manis.." *Nods proudly*

    i love being tired.

    I love going home from work and half way home ill get a msg "abang... abang kat maner??? Mommy lapar :(" and i would rush home. And when i get home and i change and i rush down and we have dinner and then we talk and we laugh and fall in love.

    I like being tired one moment and then not so tired one moment.

    because she's around.

    I find it easier to be happy... I miss you....

    the bad stuff... well i prefer to forget them anyway hahaah bye people.

    Wednesday, August 13, 2008

    Happy Left-Handers Day!!

    Pagi tadi dalam teksi terdengar sesuatu yang menarik dari radio
    membuatkan aku dan dia terpandang sesama sendiri dan tersenyum
    eceh eceh
    tapi betullah. cerita benar.

    Anyway, deejay dalam radio itu cakap,
    Hari ini adalah hari istimewa untuk sesiapa yang kidal.


    Happy Left-Handers Day, Seth!! My boyfriend Seth is a left-hander.

    And kepada kawan kawan yang kidal,
    Selamat Tangan Kiri!!
    (Cam pelik bunyinya. Betul ke dalam bm begitu? Ntah)

    Tahukah anda??
    Everyone is a Left Hander in Left Hand, West Virginia.
    (jumpe kat google. Macam tak percaya tapi maybe betul kot)


    Sunday, August 10, 2008

    Perkara 121 (1A) Perlembagaan Persekutuan

    Due to recent times, this article of the constitution has been questioned a few times over the years. I think it is outrageous that anyone would do anything to question the authority of this article. First and fore most let me reiterate the reason for this post.

    On 9th August a forum held by the Lawyers Council (Majlis Peguam) was scheduled to be held with the forum basically questioning the above mentioned article. So for those who do not understand what is the big deal, well basically the article says that the Syariah Court is not under any jurisdiction whether The High Court or the Sabah Sarawak High Court and that it acts on its own jurisdiction which should be respected by all forms of legal body in the country. This is to ensure that all Islamic matter will be handled by the Syariah court without interference from any other party be it civil and high court. This allows for a surmountable amount of legal power for muslims. So why are people afraid of it? Well most non-muslims find that getting out of Islam is not as easy as they got in it. So those who are trying to get out of Islam cannot seek help from civil lawyers but rather a syariah lawyer and all Syariah lawyers are definitly not going to go against the article.

    I think it is sheer lunacy and idiocy to go against this article of the constitution and i think its a good thing the forum was stopped rather than allowing it to proceed further and i think it is a good thing that it happened.

    Over the years there have been countless questions regarding the Malay issue and the Islam Issue. Both of course being treated in the same manner. Over the years we have always compromised the Malay Issue. We allowed for the meritocracy system and we allowed non-malays to enter malay institution such as MARA and such, over the years we have compromised. In 1988 this particular article which was included in the 1957/58 write up was amended and at the time everyone saw it as a step back for islam and yet everything went on as usual. 20 years later that want us to take another step back.

    I am angered at this, only for one reason. If there was no idea of social contract between the three races in our society i wouldnt have minded. But our founding fathers sat down on one table and decided that the indians and chinese will respect these few things or priviliges which were given to Malays and Muslims. They both agreed. All agreed. How can you turn back 51 years from that time and tell us you dont wish to obey it? Yes some things needs to change and in todays time the definition might have gotten blurred, but it is up to us to change it, not others. Up to the malays, why>?? because we were the ones who put it on the table, so if we refuse to change it,if we say no matter how hard it is, you should accept it, why? because your grandfathers agreed to it and our grandfathers agreed to it.

    If these things are not questioned then it will never be a problem. But if you question it then we will have to react.

    Salah rasanya kalau aku sendiri tidak berbahasa untuk meminta orang berbudi. Kata melayu ada menyebut "jangan kau sentuh! Agama, Sultan dan keluarga Melayu..." I remind everyone of the Malayan Union, we stood up against tyrants for our Sultan, and we will stand even stronger if the matter or cause for offence is our religion. We Will REACT. Please do not make us.

    p/s - I am not a racist... but then again if people who read this thinks so... i do not care. I just believe in a promise all the races made a long time ago. Remember we have never asked you to stop building your temples or churches. we have never stopped you from doing anything except that in which has been mentioned cannot be done. Do not make us react in a manner that will leave all of non-malays out of the governing body.

    Saturday, August 9, 2008

    True or false

    My girlfriend an avid reader of blogs came across this one page that i think a lot of people should check out -

    Now the interesting thing about this is not the post in its ownself but rather the comments that came afterwards. I was always under the impression that you should never totally and perfectly believe what we read in books, magazines or even newspapers and i assumed that most of the bloggers or people that read blogs would have the same amount of cynicism that i have. Apparently i was wrong. I have always believed that what ever happens in this world it is up to the judicial system to act and if that is corrupted God would probably show the way, however i read comments and i see all these people leaving behind idiotic and irrelevant comments and i think to myself "all this because they read something online? acting like its the gospel truth..."

    The fundamentals of being a good readers, analyst and even journalist and even a good human being is that you always have a skeptic side to everything. Why one earth would this article be published online clear cut with the fact to be placed on one side of the argument. I was thinking to myself that if i had the capacity, to change and influence how people think i might use it so people would agree with my ideas with how i saw things.

    Sadly enough a posted pdf format letter (which by the way could have been written by anyone) is all it takes to convince people. I know not how to approach this issue of sodomy and lying and religious ideas, i do not know how. All i know is that i always remain skeptic towards everything that people give you. Even the history books in high school was always questioned. Championing one man to the extent that a simply posted document on the web could convince you of his innocence is just down right idiotic.

    If someone there posted a comment as such

    "I downloaded the pdf format and had one of my lawyer friends look at it and found that it was authentic because the MD's registration number bla bla bla and there fore the letter is authentic bla bla bla"

    i would have thought "ok thats a relief someone actually took the time"

    But all i saw was

    "damn najib!"
    "go to hell badawi"
    "There is no need for a trial"

    So.. immature.

    Come on people do you really expect everyone to just read something and believe it totally? do you bloggers who once championed your ability to question everything in this world as having two sides, do you really believe reading one article online should be able to change your mind? For those who often read this blog. I wrote this blog for a group of people who are silent readers of my blog. I know they read... they've emailed me before... and i am not afraid of confrontation. read the link i posted here and think this... is a blog post really enough to convince you of something? do you believe everything you read???? :D

    Friday, August 8, 2008

    Unable to write

    kadangkala dingin hati melihat kau pergi.
    Kau seperti tidak peduli melangkah pergi,
    bagai disumpah neraka,
    bagai disimbah api dari segala petala,
    bodoh aku sekejap,
    pemergian kau menjadi gelap,
    gelap dalam tiap segenap,

    mana pergi kata-kata yang dulunya menari,
    tutur yang bagai mentari,
    menyinari memandikan diri ini,
    hujan yang suamnya menidurkan aku,
    angin yang sepoinya tidak kenal lesu.....

    aku mampu... aku mahu...
    sekarang kau pergi... dan aku menyendiri..
    dan aku tuli... bisu... buta...
    tanpa kata-kata yang dulu membawa makna berjuta rasa dan nista....

    kembali kata-kataku...
    aku mahu menulis seperti dulu....
    aku rindu okestra cipataan kita...
    aku rindu lukisan dunia yang kita hasilkan bersama..

    kembalilah kata-kataku...
    mari kita siapkan cerita kita...
    cerita kita yang bagai tiada sudahnya...

    kata-kata, perkataan, ayat, nahu, pertuturan, semuanya pulang ada aku....
    aku merayu..

    Saturday, August 2, 2008


    i miss you like a flower misses the sun...
    a flower in the depth of winter...
    with only freeze and coldness to surround it....
    cold in the vast emptiness that your absence has banished me to...

    I miss you like the air misses the morning mist...
    with only moment to have together before the sun rises and taketh it all away...
    leaving me alone and cold....
    cold in the vast emptiness that your absence has banished me to....

    I miss you like the moon misses the blanket of stars...
    the dances to keep the moon company...
    but now i am cold...
    cold in the vast emptiness that your absence has banished me to....

    i can no longer string the wonderful words you loved me for...
    i can no longer write as beautifully as i used to...
    will you leave me cold????
    will you leave cold in the vast emptiness your absence will banish me to???

    p/s - havent been able to write... to write well one must read... havent got time to read hahhhah