Rage a sequel

Summer i read your blog and i like it a lot. So much so that i thought of writing about it too. so here is what i think of the matter of rage.

Everybody gets angry from time to time. Its normal and natural and sometimes its good because repressed anger can lead to mental instability and and whats even worst is that we hurt the people close to us. My friend has rage issues. Ive heard him talk on the phone to his girlfriend and he doesnt sound like he's talking to a girlfriend. Don't get me wrong, i'm no angel myself, ask my girlfriend there has been time when i make her scared, when i make her feel like she doesn't know me, and those are the things that people feel when we get angry.

Being angry is not cool. Talk about stating the obvious huh?? herh. Getting angry hurts. It does. It hurts us, and the people around us and it hurts because anger is the closest thing to hate. So lets talk about how to make it less terrifying then it already is. okay?? for guys and girls.

Girls - remember that you girls are emotional. So much so that sometimes you rationalize other peoples anger. You justify it. You say its okay. and that is wrong. well let me ask you this question? Does he ever apologize? well if he does apologize you can look think that he has some trouble controlling it and in the future hopefully he will learn to control it. He might even succeed but what is more important is what reason does he give you. If he tells you he just got angry and he doesn't know why, and he over-reacted, then thats a good answer or any truthful answer would be a good answer. A bad answer to indicate he's nuts is this.. "Because im only comfortable being myself to you... you wont judge me even if im angry, other people would hate me if i am ever angry to them... you make it okay to be myself... to let you see everything... because im comfortable with you..."

Yeah i know. sweet answer right? But also the wrong answer. Girls if this is the your guys answer to you then maybe you ought to start thinking about the future.

Guys - Its okay to get angry/jealous/annoyed at times. trust me you need those things especially when youre in love with a girl who finds that everything in the world is good and nothing is bad. You're going to have to get angry sometimes to show that you're serious about some things. But more importantly because anger is also a test. "To what extent can she stand me? am being too angry?? lets see how far i can go".... i believe that womens greatest strength is the fact that MOST of them are patient and will love you no matter how much you look or act like a monkey. She'll love you, she might say "stop scratching your ass in public" or "pull your pants up i can see your butt-crack!!!!" but she'll love you for that and many other imperfections shes bound to find. This is what i think, get angry if that anger is what you feel. Then explain to her why you did it and give her a chance to tell you why your anger was not justified. Why? because in the end, she tolerates who you are. What you do.. shes okay with it.. so give her that opportunity to explain her self and then explain yourself.

I do this, i think to myself every time im angry, that i was lucky enough to be loved by a wonderful girl who loves me with all my imperfections, i don't want to lose it, because one day shes going to realize all this hurt and pain of getting shouted and screamed at gets boring and shes gonna leave. Every chance i get, i try to make my girlfriend laugh and that is like almost ALL THE TIME hehe but when i am angry, i feel guilty so i know i have to explain it to her why i did it or why i said it. because she deserves that.

Girls - Rage and anger is the main cause for spousal abuse. REMEMBER THIS!!! IF HE GETS ANGRY AT YOU NOW AS A GIRLFRIEND, HE MIGHT ONE DAY RESORT TO HITTING YOU BECAUSE HE'S FRUSTRATED. Disagree??? a few weeks ago me and my friends were waking home from a basketball game and we saw a couple fighting we smiled thinking it was normal (it was pathetic cause it was in public but still normal) we ignored it. Then the guy slapped his girlfriend, we were shocked and ran to him and held him back as he was kicking his leg towards her so Din did what every man can and should be allowed to do when you see a man hitting a woman, he punched him. i pushed him back and he was defensive. So i held him back and i said to him "I'm gonna let you go, if you go after her, ill break your legs into two.."

Then we talked to the girl while the guy sat like a few meters away and asked what was the problem. Small thing, She didn't answer his calls cause she was asleep. and guess what??? he always hits her. they've been together for three years and she thinks its because he loves her.

regardless of what happened that day, girls remember IT IS NEVER OKAY TO LET YOUR BOYFRIEND HIT YOU!!!!! EVEN IF HE SAYS HE DOES IT OUT OF LOVE I THINK THAT IS ABSURD AND COWARDLY!!

remember don't be reckless with other people's heart, don't put up with people who reckless with yours.

Anger can turn into violence. Dont let it girls. Make him understand you love him but youre not going to allow him to hurt you physically.

GUYS - A guy has only a few things to do in life. Pray to your god, honor your parents, love your wife, provide for your family, and be patient as much as you can. A man is only a true man when he is able to withdraw his anger in the most depressing situation. Keeping calm and keeping cool. trust me when i say the whole "I'm-cool-cause-I-have-a-lot-of-anger-in-me-that-i-need-to-let-out-with-hitting-the-wall-unti- my-hands-get-bloody-like-I'm-in-a-movie" is just plain idiotic nowadays. A punch is only worth throwing when everything else has failed and only to another guy. Be patient because it takes more strength to withhold a punch rather than throw a punch.

GIRLS - Please oh please have your self-worth intact. Don't let any guy treat you like dirt. Don't let any guy treat you like crap. "i'm comfortable enough with you to show you my anger" is idiocy. I'm comfortable with my girlfriend only to kisses her forehead before i leave her. Not to scream and shout at her. I ALMOST NEVER raise my voice. ehem ehem "see sayang im not that bad hehe"

we told the girl to leave and we told the guy that if he ever comes back, he's going to need to check his attitude then din slapped him again a few times, if you ever treat any other women like this, we'll take you to hell and leave you there ourselves.

Anger is normal. But like almost everything that is natural, Anger needs to be portioned. Like lust. Too much lust is bad, but no lust is just as bad. Too much love is bad..... wait no i was wrong... i can never have too much love heheh... you get the picture. Anger is needed to show seriousness but never to be used as a tool of possessing and controlling.

Guys.... be patient... she deserves it... she loves you.. i mean have you looked at yourself lately, your not even that good looking and your not even that smart... even if you are smart... youre NOT PERFECT.... but she loves you.... so the very least... be patient with her.... she deserves at least that....

Girls... there is no excuse for excessive anger. It is just wrong. There is no way to justify it. If your boyfriend gets angry or jealous... let him know you love him and let him know you'll try to change. (given that he convinced you that you did something wrong) but if the anger is not justified. If he gets angry at small things. Tell him to go cool down. And when it gets to a point where everyone is telling you to let go... hold on for a while longer... he might be worth it... but as soon as you feel... i love him but i cant keep on living like this.... leave... its probably the best thing that happened to him cause he's going to realize his mistake and change.

I used to be a very angry person. I hated life. I hated everyone in it. When my dad died, i thought i was being left behind and anger was the only way to hide the fact that i was actually... lonely... guys.... being angry doesn't help ease the pain of insecurity and it doesn't help ease the fear of being alone. It doesn't. trust me. Being angry is fine but being angry all the time is going to drain you out of wanting love and live slowly. You'll die alone and bitter if you let the anger engulf you. Be patient, take a deep breath, take a step back, sit down, AMIK AIR SEMAYANG KALAU PERLU, and think rationally. Life is too short to spend it all being angry, girls life is too short too spend it being screamed at. Lets all put anger aside. Men or Women. put it aside as much as we can and we'll be fine. By the Way the whole PMS thing is like a freak of nature. My advice when you see it coming.... run far far far away... its like a hurricane there's no use fighting it hehehe TRUST ME I KNOW hehe....

Anyways, live life to the fullest and to do that... you need to.. well like the words of my wonderful co-writer in this blog "Smile like you mean it :)"