Monday, December 29, 2008

Salam Ma'al Hijrah 1430

Salam Maal Hijrah to all!
Especially to Muslimin Muslimat.

It's the 1st day of the Muslim New Year,
the new 'book' is opened, and the old one is closed
so people said.

Will we change, remain the same or become better?

May the year ahead be a prosperous one
filled with Khair, Barakah,
Rahmah, Happiness, Health,
Wealth, Success, Love and Peace
InsyaAllah.

Please forgive us if we have said or done anything wrong
knowingly or unknowingly.


Hanafee & Sabrina
1 Muharram 1430 Hijrah

Sunday, December 21, 2008

Short Story Part 3


The James Morrison "You Make it Real" music played on my desktop, as i watch closely at the lyrics and their meaning. The symbolism and the metaphors. Slowly i closed my eyes wishing i could finish the article that i never thought id write. The covers on my bed were ruffled as i stood at the window looking across the edge of the window over looking the lake. For a moment i stood static relishing the beauty the of the freshly cleaned air distilled by the rain.

I leaned forward against my window with my elbows on the window sill, my cigarette in one hand seems to still retain its taste. For some, it offers that security that no matter what happens, it will never change. The bitter taste will always be there, seclusion and solitude of not sharing something that taste so vivid and alive with anyone. Your own personal cigarette. I glanced over my shoulder looking at my bed again, so enticed to continue that dream i was having. I exhaled disappointed with myself. Letting myself down again for the umpteenth time.

I looked again towards the laying lake in front of me focusing the pleasant serene holy passion of a real view in front of. The sound of piano music wakes me from my serene view as i realized that my handphone was ringing.

"Hello, Huzir speaking..." I said, sundays arent really good days for me.
"Zir, this is me....." A trailing shivering voice, familiar. But not familiar enough for me to recognize.
"Who is this again?" I asked trying to be polite, not wanting to offend.
"Its me... Faizal..."
"Zal... oh my god its been ages since i heard from you..." Happy for a moment...
"Zir... we'll catch up later... i need your help... Im in trouble... big trouble.." I sway away from my estaticness for a moment to realize it was panic in his voice.

I hung up the phone and quickly ran out the house picking up my car keys on the living room table and rushed to my car. I got into my car with these visions in my head of the kinds of problems he might be facing.... My head wandered to the past.

Sitting together by the beach with a fire behind us, and two of our closest friends sleeping in the back on the mat in open air. Sipping the bottled drinks in our hands gently listening to the waves crushing against the beach. Under the moon lit beach we both sat looking out into the ocean. We were 17, it was a trip we didnt plan, eating whatever we could find and staying away from home for the next 5 days. I sat there cigarette in hand with my bottle half buried in sand. He lit up a cigarette.

"You know sometimes when i think about the four of us...." He said suddenly as i turned to listen.
"Sometimes i get scared, i get scared that one day, we might never be like this anymore, we might forget just how much we mean to each other. We might stop remembering the bloods we've spilled to protect each other, the tears we've cried for each other... the stories we stop telling people because we get old and forget... forgettting us...."
"Thats never gonna happen... you know that..." I said trying to sound sure. But in truth, i wasnt.
"How do you know?" He said huffing a cloud of smoke from his mouth.
"Coz we're too stupid to live by ourselves. We're gonna always need each other. I mean look at those idiots sleeping, i mean come on. If your gonna sleep in public in open space the least you could do is not show the world what you've got hiding in your pants" I said jokingly as we both turned and laughed at Farid's erection.

We stopped and kept smoking.

"Zir... I want you to remember something... No matter what happens... no matter how long we lose contact from each other... i want you to know that you can find me anytime... if you need my help.... you my brother... youre not just a friend... youre my brother...."

I looked at him smiled and nodded. Faizal was that kind of friend. The older brother you went to for advice. He might not have had his life together but he gave good advice and all three of us looked up to him.

"Zal... no matter how far apart we grow from each other.... i will always be this guy you had a drink and a cig with... i will always be you friend...."

It has been 5 years since i heard from him and i still remembered that promise. The promise we made again the next day after the other two idiots were awake. We took an oath at dawn to the moon and the sun that nothing would ever broke part our friendship. Im honoring it now.

You forget that often at times you are tested by the terms and rules and conditions the world and fate has set for you. But somehow, that night on that beach, the morning we all promised, we all wanted it. We all wanted to tied by the burden of an oath so true that we live it today. That we would drop everything else we were doing just because they asked us to. Just because we knew we had to. Just because we knew we wanted to. Just because we promised to do so.

This is when all that happened in the past mattered, the stories, the drinks, the laughs, the over-running feel of familiarity. Today though, together embroidered with those feelings were nerves, fear and wonder. Will we all be the same when we finally meet? Will we all be able to look at each other, and still remember that a not so long time ago, we could have died for each other. That not so long ago, we defied others so we could be, Ourselves. Forever the lords of our own fate, and the fate of three others we so solemly promised.

Cyberspace Tombstone

Looking at the horizon,
Endless field of words,
A sea of idioms,
A star-lit sky of stories,
Unhinged and unchanged by time....

Often more than not you go back,
to see whether the wound has completely healed,
Whether the words you had misspelled anonymously,
can no longer hurt,

You're surprised not by the changing times and tide,
but how static your words are,
how they've seemed to make a home there,
somewhere,
everywhere,

A simple moment of trying to re-write,
re-trace,
The simple idiotic mind that you were in when you wrote it,
you hid it,
not wanting others to find out,
why hide in cyberspace?

If words could hurt,
mine would kill,
yours could just kill....
a reminder of the past that haunts us,
the past that might kill me,

So i lay,
looking at my own tombstone,
engraved on another mans words,
but on the stone of my death,
the stories you wrote,
is my ending,
so let me hide mine,
in my own way of forever unknown,
backing from the throne that was once mine.

Because your final words,
were my cyberspace tombstone.

p/s - Okay.. for literature enthusiasts!!! I challenge all of you.. what does this poem mean????? hahahahhaha

and p/s - Couldnt find the picture for this post... a tombstone seems so gloomy

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Internship


15 December 2008
Internship started.

How was my first day? - Ok
And second day? - Good
Details? - Will be updated by Shuwa.
Hehe.

Lots of info for the first day
I had to squeeze my eyes and mind to remember key words
and colleagues' names.
*Smiles*

Oh, we are assigned to Commissioning Department,
under Database Section
which means we will play with databases a lot!!
Aja aja fighting!!!

Alright.
Night night.
Need to sleep early.
Need to wake up early.


written by,

Tuesday, December 9, 2008

Short Story Part 2



The cold breeze woke me from my deep sleep. Realizing I was still on the bus without any idea where i was. Since I had no idea where i was, i decided to fall back to sleep. Then suddenly i was overwhelmed by a strong scent. I tried hard to figure out where the scent came from. Tilting my head downward a bit, I realized it came from my shirt. The smell of something familiar.

It had been years since i had smelt that scent. Slowly i whiffed my shirt again, as tears began rolling down my cheeks. I closed my eyes and flashes of it played in my head, like memories from an old movie. Frame by frame of laughing, tears of joy, the laughter, the screaming in joy and agony and defeat. The stinging feeling of defeat.

Four brothers huddled around an old carrom board, with their mother sitting on the sofa. Its odd isnt it, that smile your mother has when she sees all her children together having fun. Its, indescribable. I dont think any civilization was able to come up with a word for it. No adjectives, no pro-nouns, and you can only understand it by looking at that smile.

The four brothers. Different yet alike. Unique in their own little way and the same in that cliched manner. They were the stuff of legends filled with humility. The story that would fill the empty pages of history for tomorrow.

"Zir, what are you thinking about?" My mother startled me.
"You off dreaming about that princess of yours?" my oldest brother intervenes as always.
"Scared shes gonna run off with another guy?" Youngest brother toying with my all so familiar insecurities.
"Probably left this loser already" My witty second older brother as they all burst out laughing.

I smiled, meaningful, so true that my family detect that my thoughts were more important than jokes as they held their breath for my explanation.

"I was thinking, how this feels a lot like.... a lot like home...." They all looked at me as my mother rubbed my hair and kissed my forehead and as my brother looked at each other. Realizing the important idea i had just brought up.

Home is not where you sleep every night, its where you come home to remember the past, live in the present and hope for a better tomorrow. Home is where you are reminded just how important family is, because despite every argument and contradictions, nothing is more important than those who sits with you, and enjoys that same feeling with you. A home is where its okay to be an idiot and have people around to laugh with you about it. A home is a bunch of people eating the same food together. A home is where your mom is... well at least most of the time. More importantly, a home is only a home when you feel like its home. If the people in it and around it make it feel like home. Home is not having to understand what has changed or how are things different. Home is when you look at your brothers and mother and think... This feels like home.


p/s - Happy Eidil Adha my brothers, our time was brief but it made me remember how amazingly like home we felt finally.....

read part one here
read part two here

Wednesday, December 3, 2008

Twilight & Selamat Pagi Cinta

TWILIGHT BEST !!!
3 stars for movie.
It's full of awkwardness but it also makes u stay till the end.
4 stars for all the vampires in the movie.
All vampires (both good and evil) are like so sooo COOL...
and 5 stars for EDWARD CULLEN character!!!!!
Damn!
A protective boyfriend is HOT.
Trust me.
Coz I have one.
=P




Dukacita ingin dimaklumkan bahawa
walaupun dibintangi pelakon-pelakon yang hebat
Filem Selamat Pagi Cinta
TAK BEST
SANGAT
AMAT
MENGECEWAKAN

Anda akan tak sabar nak keluar dari panggung wayang.
Sedih.
Salah siapa ni?
Pelakon atau skrip atau pengarah?

Kesimpulannya,
Sabrina dan Hanafee akan menonton filem melayu di panggung
hanya jika filem itu dari
Yasmin Ahmad
dan
Kabir Bhatia


Sekian.


written by,

Monday, December 1, 2008

Pengorbanan Seorang Perempuan


bangun tidur
sapu lantai bilik
mop lantai bilik
sapu lantai bilik kali ke-2 (bile lantai dah kering)
cuci toilet bilik
buang sampah bilik
letak plastik sampah yang baru
dah habis kemas bilik
boleh mandi dengan senang hati

Pergh... ni baru satu bilik kecik...
belum bilik besar lagi...
belum masuk bilik-bilik lain lagi...
belum masuk toilet-toilet lain lagi...
belum kira ruang tamu lagi...
belum kira dapur lagi...
belum kira halaman rumah lagi...

kalau rumah kecik.. macam senang, ye tak??

belum rumah besar lagi..
belum rumah besar 2 tingkat lagi..
kalau orang tu rumah 3 tingkat cenggane??!!

haih...

patutlah orang-orang kaya ada pembantu rumah..
patutlah surirumah yg takde pembantu rumah mengadu kepenatan..
kemas rumah lagi...
kene jaga anak anak lagi...
masak lagi...
jaga kecantikan diri supaya suami senang hati lagi...
itu kalau isteri duk rumah tak bekerja..

kalau bekerja???

haih...

patutlah kadang-kadang perempuan terlepas pandang bab-bab kebersihan rumah...bab anak..bab masak..bab kecantikan diri.
sebab banyak benda nak kene fikir, nak kena urus.

patutlah emak bising kalau cawan dah minum letak bersepah..
patutlah ibu bising kalau bilik tak kemas..
patutlah mama bising kalau sampah tak buang...
patutlah mommy bising kalau habuk rokok merata-rata
patutlah abah senyap je bila mak bebel sebab dia pun buat bende salah yang sama macam anak dia... hahahha
patutlah mak sedih bila anak anak tak dengar kata... =(

sebab....mengemas itu penat okay??!!!
sebab jadi surirumah itu penat okay??
sebab jadi perempuan itu leceh okay??

apa?? saya comot?? sapa suh saya fikir macam macam??

baiklah.
awak uruskan rumah sendiri.
awak uruskan makan pakai awak sendiri.
awak uruskan perangai akhlak anak anak.
awak uruskan kewangan keluarga.
awak uruskan bil bil semua.

saya boleh relax.
saya boleh buat rambut. saya boleh buat kuku. saya boleh buat duit.
peduli apa saya kalau rumah terumbang ambing, anak anak nakal.
yg penting, isteri cantik, awak bangga.
pastu lelaki lain bawak lari
awak mahu itu?

*senyum*

hehe. maaf. entri ini sebenarnya pasal kebersihan. termasuk hal rumah tangga pulak. hahahhahaha.

macam sudah kahwin pulak.
*gelak hell lagi*

kesimpulannya,
marilah menghargai pengorbanan ibu, emak, mama, ummi, mommy
marilah menghargai pengorbanan isteri

marilah menjaga kebersihan.

*kenyit mata*

Friday, November 21, 2008

Oh Taman Rinting !


Hati aku ni meronta-ronta nak pulang ke rumah. Aku rindu semua orang di rumah. Aku rindu segala macam benda di rumah. Bau, bunyi, suasana, makanan, pemandangan - aku rindu.

Biarlah rumah itu kecil, terhimpit, lama. Biarlah kais pagi makan pagi, kais petang makan petang. Tapi kebahagiaan, keselesaan, ketenangan - itu ada.

Tapi aku sekarang ini sedang menaip di sebuah apartment ada jaga, ada kolam renang, ada tasik, ada mall. Aku senyum, aku ketawa, kamu fikir aku tenang, aku bahagia??

Tidak. Aku ini tidak tenteram, amat! Yang aku dengar setiap saat adalah pekikan kereta motor, ngauman lori, jeritan kereta api. Yang aku lihat setiap hari adalah pandangan yang menghampakan.

Di rumah sebenar aku boleh dengar suara ngaji budak-budak kecil, alunan azan bila tiba waktu, gelak ketawa anak istimewa, bebelan emak, gurauan adik. Bohong kalau aku kata bunyi kereta motor lori itu tidak ada. Ada, tapi tidaklah sebising macam yang aku sedang dengar ni.

Aku tidak sabar mahu balik rumah.
Dalam kebisingan bandar ni aku sebenarnya sunyi.
Orang orang dalam rumah ni pergi kerja awal pagi,
Aku nak buat apa lepas tu nanti?
Jangan sebut internet.
Sebab itu sudah basi.

Hah.
Sekarang aku tau kenapa aku tidak tenang dan sunyi
Aku ni mmg suka buat kesimpulan sudut agama campur duniawi
Sebab utama adalah aku berdosa pada Ilahi
Sekian. Terima kasih sebab sudi habis baca sampai perenggan ni.

Monday, November 17, 2008

Happy 2nd Anniversary =)

Amaran awal: Entri Jiwang. Siapa tak suka. Sila berhenti baca sekarang. =P


Bear & Chocolates to me from him. Love Coupons to him from me.

Sudah baca tajuk?
Jadi, umum sedia maklum bahawa
Hari ini adalah ulang tahun ke-2
Sabrina & Hanafee


*senyum*


tadi telefon mak:

"mak, hari ini anniversary akak dgn fee yg ke-2!!"
"ye ke? Eleh... belum ikat bebetul lagi dah nak kira anniversary"
"eleh... biarlah kitorang nak kira dulu.. haha"
"mak dulu kawan ngan abah takde kira-kira pun tau..."
"tu lah.. sapa suh tak kira.."


*gelak*


Apa yang misteri ialah...
Bagaimana cinta bermula?

Apa yang mencabar adalah...
bagaimana mahu membuat cinta itu kekal.

Apa yang menarik dan magik adalah...
bila ia menjadi.


Korang yg membaca, doakan kami ek??


*senyum*





written by,

Happy Birthday Jiji !!


November 17

Happy Birthday Azidah!!!

roommate 2 tahun.
Tahun 2.
Tahun 4.

Tak nampak jiji online..
hmmph.
Ni mesti keluar celebrate dgn Apek ni.
hehe.

Semoga king kong berbahagia bersama gorila!!!




written by,

Friday, November 14, 2008

Happy Birthday Mashe!!!


Happy Birthday Mashe!!!

On your birthday lots of people are thinking of you.
I just wanted to let you know that I am one of them.
*winks*

Doa aku adalah...
Semoga kamu dan suami bahagia dunia akhirat sampai ke syurga!!
*smiles*




written by,

Saturday, November 8, 2008

Anda Bosan?

The end of 7th semester is coming, while other students are busy with their finals exams, 4BCS students are busy with how-to-kill-the-time-while-waiting-for-final-year-project-results.

Yeap. We don’t have final exams this semester. It’s a good thing and a bad thing.

Good because we don’t have to squeeze our minds remembering this and that, in other words, no stress.

Bad because those with final exams can go back home earlier than us. Cait!!! But we, we are not allowed to go back till we submit the final hard-covered thesis.

The problem is we cannot send it to be hard-covered till we got our fyp’s results.
And the results cannot be announced till lecturers involved sit in a meeting for “permurnian markah” next week.




Sabarlah kawan-kawan,
Aku tau kamu, kamu, kamu semua dah bosan gila baban.
Oleh itu, mari… mari semua buat kraf-tangan
Atau keluar jalan jalan cari makan.

Hmmph.

Happy Birthday Nana!!



Today is Nana's birthday.
Nana was my roommates for 4 sems
which means 2 years.
First year.
Third year.

Alright. No speech.
Since I've written everything on the card.
Hand-made card.
*grins*

Happy Birthday again, babe!

Monday, November 3, 2008

Topeng topeng


Dia,
buat kau hairan,
buat kau tak keruan,

buat kau sedih,
buat kau ketagih,

buat kau gembira,
buat kau merana.

Dia yang sedang dalam kesedihan,
kerisauan,
tapi gelak sakan,
dengan kawan kawan.

Kenapa?
Tak percaya?
Apa kau tak pernah, memakai topeng macam dia?

Hiriskanlah kata kata
sampai dia terdera.
Hati dia sudah kebal,
sudah biasa.

Sunday, November 2, 2008

Beautiful Word Clouds


I present you my
Word Clouds!!!!





Nak Jugak????

Klik-lah sini.

WORDLE

Selamat Mencuba~!!

Saturday, November 1, 2008

Writer (Poem)

I felt like writing,
but my head was filled with nothing,
I wanted to tell you a story about guns a blazing,
i couldnt find the right words so a sentence i could string.

I fear for my ability to write,
im scared it might die and my life will never take flight,
I fear that one day i might stop making sense,
because tomorrow is another day i get moe dense,

I fear i cant stop for a while to smell and see the good things all around,
in sunshines and rains and the road outward bound,
I fear to not live life as i have,
or at least not write about living life as i have.

I fear that of which people cannot comprehend,
when the best things in life i cannot apprehend,
I drink the sovereign drink of beauty and love,
yet im only drunk on hate and nothingness,

the hangover though is a piece of yesterday i wish i could re-live,
and the regret is that i cannot hide the feelings i have,

yet i wake again tomorrow,
for same life i believe will bring me sorrow,
because tomorrow..... maybe ill die and no one will be drowned in sorrow....

Thursday, October 30, 2008

Good Luck


Today, 30th of October 2008, is the day my Sweet Sabrina Summer is going to present the work shes been doing for the past 6 months.

She is scared and she is nervous.

I hope she'll read this before she presents.

I wanna tell you Good Luck!!! but good luck has nothing to do with anything.

You deserve the best because you have tried your hardest and you have tried your best. You already have an A in my book. Now is the time to let go and enjoy this once in a lifetime experience. Go show people how good you really. Just how amazingly talented and wonderful you are.

Tapi for the sake of tradition......

SAYANG!!!!!!!!
GOOD LUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!

Monday, October 27, 2008

Like over 100 and 150 years old

Bergambar ketika majlis hari raya universiti konon-konon 100 tahun dulu...
Siap ber vespa lagi.


Poster konon konon100 tahun yang dulu... yang konon kononnya nak letak kat pintu bilik

Mcm cool kan?

Aku convert gambar gambar di atas kat laman web bawah ni.

Saturday, October 25, 2008

Talk to Me

Please click the sentence below.

A man picks up a phone to find there's already someone waiting to talk.

I just want to talk to you...
Give me a sign,
Let me know you are there...

I really need you...
All I can do is sit here and wait for you to pick up the phone..

Alright alright,
Call me when you are ready to talk..

End.


Friday, October 24, 2008

Can u feel her?


Picture by Audrey Kawasaki.

Perang Poster

Semua orang tunjuk poster.
Haish.

Nah.
Ini poster projek sarjana muda aku.
Poster ini Seth yg tolong buatkan.

*senyum*

Dia tidak menggunakan Photoshop.

Kamu.
Terima kasih ya.

*senyum lagi*



p/s: Siapa curik design poster ni tanpa kebenaran aku, siaplah!!
*gelak hell*

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

A short story


AS placed his slit wrist on the floor, blood began to spill forming this puddle on the floor slow building and getting bigger. As his skin slowly starts to lose color. He looks to the ceiling with tears welling in his eyes and he keeps looking.

The average person bleeds to death in less than 5 minutes. If by 5 minutes you do not get medical help there is a big possibility that death is imminent. First you slowly, you start feeling cold. Blood warms you and when they start oozing out of you you begin to lose that warmth. Then your fingers go numb. You wont be able to feel them. Theoretically, you move them still hoping you can feel them but evidently it will be useless. Then your legs go cold and numb.

Then suddenly, you feel a strong thumping sound on your chest, you think that you just realized your heart beating, when in actuality, your heart is starting to beat stronger, because your heart just realized that blood supply is getting weaker.

Your lips turn blue from red, your mouth turns bitter from the adrenaline, but not even adrenaline can save you this time, you close your eyes slowly and..... eternity ensues...

"As I lay with head against the wall,
As i lay and as i let death take me all,
i felt a feeling creeping in a crawl,
this pain is nothing compared to what you did... nothing at all"

p/s Getting things out of my system... who will care????

Saturday, October 18, 2008

A New Perspective


There have been number of times in class during my University days (God i make sound so long ago) that i have been asked to look at something from a different perspective. In all honesty i have never found difficulty doing so. Being employed now and having stricter rules applied on such a free-driven soul feels like I have a new set of chains slapped on my wrists and a metal collar around my neck strangling the air out of me. The air of idealisticness... the air of a utopia-like system.


Working these past few months i have realized that ideals account for nothing because everyone is so comfortable the way things are. No one wants new change even though the change might be good. Being employed has showed me that the working world wants us to be mediocre, to be not more and not less. The working world has told me that they need plain individuals to do nothing about the current status quo. But i refuse.

What lies beyond the horizon for me as i have found so many times in my past is the same question i have yet found the answer to. Dare to be different? or blend in? Average Joe or idealist extraordinaire? Mediocre or A foot above the rest? All my life i have always tried to pick the latter. Wanting to make a difference no matter what.

That road that i have taken has led me to numerous accounts of pain, disappointment and anguish. Sometimes even to the point of desperation to change the world accounts on what is today labeled as "the way things are"

Words that dim my heart and drowns my soul includes -

Why swim against the current?
Keep your head down...
Keep your thoughts to yourself...
Ignore it...

To name a few...

A lecturer of mine once said that "The generation you live in today, celebrates mediocrity. Their basic foundation is based on the fact that they need not the extraordinary, the great nor the amazing, what they need and want is silence and obedience. There will be a time in your life when you will find that the world beats you down, kicks you, until you admit that you are helpless..."

Its true, having only worked for a few months, most would say that I have no idea what i am talking about. But let it be... let me say this as a reminder to those share my ideals. To those who still believe that a small gesture might just change the world, a reminder for the idealist who needs hope to believe that there IS change beyond the horizon, not just another dead end world which we are all condemned to. A reminder to those who will come out swinging so they'll keep trying and keep swinging.

I refuse to bow down to the levels of mediocrity. I refuse to accept the mediocre world we live in today is all we have to look forward to. I refuse to believe that we cannot change it. I refuse to believe that ideals will only remain ideals.

I will keep my passion. I will keep my enthusiasm. I will take the punches and the kicks and ill keep on swinging. There is no point in living if im living to standards set by mediocre individuals in an effort to distort greatness. I know that one day, if i keep holding on, my generation will come to back me up. Individuals with my ideals will come and join me. Our numbers will grow and our voices will be heard. The generation of intellects that will put above all else the importance of holistic individual development. The generation of idealist so significant they measure to other idealist such as Socrates and Plato.

To those fighting the good fight, keep your spirit. Dont let the working world beat you down and sink you to mediocrity. Remember the words -

"We are all meant to shine as children do.
It's not just in some of us; it is in everyone.
And as we let our own lights shine,
we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same."

As our light dims, hold on to it, let shine even if slightly, and one day, when we find our place, we will be the beacon of light that guides souls to amazing-ness. One day we will all become stars that help navigate and guide way to something more. THE END


Friday, October 17, 2008

Harakiri


Silence ensues...

"What if it happens again? What if....... i get hurt....... again?"
"It wont, Im sorry, it wont..."
"What if you cant?"
"I can... I'll do it..."
"If you cant.... I guess the picture tells all.....
its the only way to make the pain go away........
its the only way... i can keep honor..."

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

September & October Birthday Girls!!




OCTOBER 15

Kick off ur shoes, take a break,
Crank the tunes,Dance & Shake,
light the candles, cut the cake .
Make today a day, that's simply Great!!!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SHALEEN~!!!















OCTOBER 11

Dah wish kat skype,
kat wordpress pun dah,
so wish sini pulak!!
=D

Semoga berjaya di kerjaya nanti!!

HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY TASYA~!!!













SEPTEMBER 27

Dah wish kat plurk,
Kat wordpress tak pasti pulak,
Walaupun bulan lepas,
Aku nak include ko jugak!!
=D

Semoga kita berjaya dalam PSM2 and
together-gether we go to Sime Darby!!!
Wahhahaha.

HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY SHURA!!!

Sunday, October 12, 2008

Blogging brothers



I haven't had time to blog for some time now. Thank God summer always have time to update the blog even if to just promote free handbags (Thanks sweety)

The main reason i am writing this blog is because i want to welcome my youngest brother to the blogging world. He now has a blog!!!! A friendster blog but im sure he'll change to blogger or blogspot anytime soon. Anyway, i had always mentioned to him that he should blog, its a wonderful experience to be able to write and leave comments and let you opinions be heard and in truth he has some of the best ideas i have ever heard. I am as happy as a pigeon that he finally chose to pick up blogging and giving him a chance to have his voice heard.

A notice to my brother, Khairery Abdul Rahman, You will find many things in the blogging world where people would comment on your writing and some might even ridicule you... but dont listen to them... You write the way you wanna write, you write about what you wanna write... what matters most is that you are happy with how you write... if youre not happy then work harder write more and try more... You have greatness in you and you deserve every bit of greatness as long as you try for it... Keep writing brother... if you promise to keep writing i promise to keep reading!!!!!

Congratulations.

For everyone, my brothers blog can be found here at this URL

http://aire.blog.friendster.com/

Do drop by and leave him a comment, there is no greater pleasure in the blogging world than to welcome a new blogger with new ideas and profound writing skills.

Tuesday, October 7, 2008

Free Handbag!!!


Handbag Planet is giving away FREE handbags!!!

There's absolutely no catch -
this means no shipping/handling fees or credit card required.
Yes, it's really that simple!

You just have to sign up HERE or go to this website http://www.handbagplanet.com/

and then select the bag you would likely to win.

Try-lah. No harm anyway.

Kalau dapat rezeki. Tak dapat tak rugi apa-apa. Hehe.

Good Luck!!!

Tuesday, September 23, 2008

GOOD NEWS!!!!


For those of you unfamiliar with allmalaysia.info well basically the website is what the name tells literally. It has basic information on Malaysia. Their latest section of AMBP (All Malaysian Blogs Project) is where they review the good blogs and recommend them to people. They usually find a lot of good blogs and they give an interesting write up or review about the blog. A few weeks ago, Summer drew my attention to the fact that we were the featured blog for the web at:

http://allmalaysia.info/ambp/editor/


And at that time i didnt think it was that big a deal because i had once been featured in blog directory which was fine. Little that i know that allmalaysia.info was part of The Star Newspaper project and now im hooked. The cool thing about it is that it has been the featured blog for almost a month now, we were featured on the 20th of August and I'm no mathematical genius but i think that qualifies for a month. So there it goes. Me and Summer were happy, the reprecussions???

Well basically our nuffnang analytics indicator has mentioned for various weeks now that our total of blog readers or at least people who come to the blog have reached an estimation of 1407 unique readers, averaging more than 200 readers per week. Summer is so excited and when shes excited that means i am too... yes people i know how pathetic that sounds huh!!...

Anyway... for who ever that has been putting us on the map.. me and summer would like to say thank you... and for those who just dropped by for the first time leave a comment on any post we'll get back to you for sure!!!!!!!!!!!!! Thanks people!!!!!!!!

The paragraphs below is added by Summer (hehe):

To family and friends and even you stranger, thank you. thank you so much.

Nombor 1407 itu bukanlah jumlah yg mahu dibanggakan. Sebenarnya kami berdua tersangat excited sampai nak berkongsi kegembiraan dan ke-excited-an kami ni!!! hehehhehe. Kalau dibandingkan dgn blog Dr. Mahathir or MalaysianToday, mmg seciput gile lah bilangan unique reader blog kami ni. hehe. Tapi what the plurk la kan??? Nak happy jugak!!!! =P

Thanks to AllMalaysiaInfo. You have increased the visitors to this blog and so I'm more than happy to promote your site too.. (Orang berbudi, kita berbahasa, tak gitu?)

To you who want to get more visitors as well as readers, please do not hesitate to register HERE or copy paste this link: http://allmalaysia.info/ambp/blogdir.asp

Who knows?? You might be the next featured blog..... =)

With that, We Thank You.

p/s: Wei presiden DUTA KBH!!!! Sejiwang jiwang blog kitorang pun, dapat jadik featured blog wei!!! (ini adalah gurauan) wahahhahahhha =D

Sunday, September 21, 2008

Ramadhan and Syawal


It has been awhile since i had written anything in this blog. My last post was on the 11th of September titled "Pendatang" so first and foremost thank you my Sweet Summer for keeping this blog rolling while I was desperately out of inspiration.

Now enough with hellos and handshakes and straight to the agenda for today. I had not had the chance to wish readers happy ramadhan and happy upcoming syawal. As much as i would like everyone to know that I have the highest of regards for this two Islam months, it has not been the best of friends in my past. My father during his life, had loved Ramadhan always motivating us to fast and later rewarding us with anything we wanted to eat. I remember days when my dad would come home and see me pale faced and tired and he would tell me

"takper... berapa jam je lagi... sabar k boy??"

We would also cuddle together in the living room when i was little with my brothers on the couch, my mom right beside my dad on the carpet in the living room floor while he placed me and my youngest brother gently and neatly under his arms and he began telling us stories of what faith could achieve. Faith in Islam. Every raya morning my dad would wake us al four boys up and he would take us all to "sembahyang" raya and right after come home for the first meal of the day. My mom would be first in line to apologize to my dad. And my youngest brother last and up until he was 9 still ended the session with "abah duit raya mana????" and we ate and we sat and we would be happy. My dad would refuse to think about his stressful job, my mom would be all busy cooking, and my brothers would be too busy watching Feminin or KRU or 4u2c on the television set. And i would sit somewhere watching.

After my father passed away...................

Things were never the same.

If youve been wondering what kind of post is this... its a confession... confession to why i have never been happy about raya, or never been upbeat about raya.....

My Father made Ramadhan and Syawal so special, that sometimes i feel that without him, there is no point in going through any of it, none the less i do it. I fast, i go home and i go to the mosque and i celebrate raya but all, with spirit of only going through the motions. Yes i do miss him, and yes if i could, i would celebrate as if he was still alive.

I dont mean to pull everyone down with me. You should enjoy your Syawal and Ramadhan. Make the memories count, but the other day my friends and i during talking asked me a question...

"If you could have one wish during lailatul Qadar, what would you ask for??"

You can probably guess the few typical and non typical answers, money, wealth, health, iman, faith, belief... i off course answered Money.... However deep in my heart i questioned....

Would be possible if my dad could come back to life for just one day of puasa and one day hari raya??? Just those two days so we could sit one more time in that place while he speak to us in tht voice that when i remember now, brings tears to my eyes.... that warmth.... that stare.... Can Lailatul Qadar bring my father back??????????

This year... it doesnt feel different... it still feels empty... it still feels sad.... its still different.

My Second brother who is married might be celebrating raya at his wifes house which is fine i guess. So that leaves me with Mom, My oldest brother and my youngest brother. 4 of us...

People who know me i dont tend to turn to God when i have a problem, only when i am at my best and when i happy i turn to God to thank him for everything. But this will be my 11th Raya without my Dad so i say this to God...

"God, give me strength to smile on the eve of celebration... so my mother will smile with me....
God give strength to hold my tears on the morning of celebration.. So my mother will think i am happy...
God give me heart... so i can enjoy it just a little bit like when my dad was alive....
God give me..... Give me anything... let me fake happiness for the people around me....
God.... help..."

p/s - Remember those you have with you... you'll never know when they'll be gone.... Love them like theres no tomorrow... because they loved you yesterday... like there is no today...
p/s and p/s - pic was taken from sebolku.blogspot.com and i added a message.... that was the color of my dads last baju raya when i was twelve...

Selamat hari Raya people....

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Hari Nuzul Quran

I almost forgot today is Nuzul Quran Day
Usually mom would call and remind me
Thank God a lecturer mentioned it last night.

From Wikipedia Bahasa Melayu:

Hari Nuzul Quran adalah merupakan hari memperingati Nuzul Quran (turunnya al-Quran) kepada Nabi Muhammad S.AW pertama kalinya ketika baginda sedang berkhalwat di Gua Hira pada malam Jumaat pertepatan pada tanggal 17 Ramadhan iaitu tehun ke 41 hari kelahiran baginda atau pada tanggal 6 Ogos 610M.



To our Muslim readers.
Happy Nuzul Quran Day
=)

Marilah mengisi hari hari kita dgn bacaan ayat Al Quran

Mak kata
"Ayat-ayat ni Quran teman kita di kubur,
ayat ayat Quran ni makanan kepada roh kita
Bacalah Quran dan niatkan untuk
roh roh ibu bapa, adik beradik, atuk nenek, keluarga,
tak kisahlah yg masih hidup atau sudah berada di Sana"



p/s: Johor tak cuti, tapi Pahang and Selangor cuti. =)

Sunday, September 14, 2008

Bintang, Aku, Dia dan juga Cinta

Perhatian: Entri ini seperti kejiwangan tapi Oh tidak sebenarnya.

Saya ini sedang berada dalam keresahan dan ketidaksenangan hati.
Ketakutan pun ada juga.

Salah satu cara untuk menghilangkan tekanan itu
maka wujudlah entri seperti ini.

Saya suka.
Saya gembira.
Membacanya.

Abaikan tatabahasa yang rosak, ya.

Aku & Dia menggapai bintang.
Eceh eceh.
Poyo.
Hahahahhahha.

Suka gambar di atas ini amat, sangat, bangat.

Siapa nak bergambar seperti itu boleh pergi ke Mines.
=)



Yang di atas ini ditujukan untuk Hanafee.
I love you!

Saya buat sendiri.
Ketika mengantuk petang tapi tak nak lena.
Tidak susah.
Hanya kretiviti dan fokus.
Guna Microsoft Word 2007 sahaja.

Sekian. Tamat.
Terima Kasey!!!!

Friday, September 12, 2008

Smile!!!


Blog ini telah di-tag oleh Pjoy
Agak tak paham jugak lah pada mulanya...
apa benda yang nak kena buat?

Oh, kene letak gambar di atas dalam post baru.
Itu je rupanya.
=D

To all readers...
Ceria-ceriakan lah hari anda
dengan senyuman yang menawan!!!

Senyum seindah suria~
Yang membawa cahaya~
Senyumlah dari hati~
Dunia pun berseri~

Senyum umpama impian~
Dalam kehidupan~
kau tersenyum, ku tersenyum~
Kemesraan menguntum~

Yay!!

p/s: Senyum itu sedekah. =)

Thursday, September 11, 2008

Pendatang!!!!!!!!!!


Summer mentioned that i had not written a political piece in a very long time and as i thought about it, i realized i did not want to write about it. Many of my friends wondered why i had not taken interest in this matter and to show i am interested i have written this post.

All day long we read in blogs and newspaper seeking redemption, seeking that extreme measures need to be taken because what Ahmad Ismail had done was unacceptable. I am disgusted at this. Minority leaders spoke of equality and that we should all learn to accept each other in order to live in this country we call Malaysia, but i have not seen one minority leader say

"What Ahmad Ismail said should not be taken seriously, it was a comment of one man who seems frustrated with his surroundings, a man who might not have been in the right frame of mind when he said what he said.."

No one said anything along these lines, not one, and reactions of minority leaders all seem to be that Ahmad Ismail needs to be punished, hanged, politically banned, arent these comments going to generate even more hatred? I think politicians today are more looking out for themselves. They know that if they spoke harshly on behalf of their own race they will fuel anger towards Ahmad Ismail and later fuel hatred on the party that Ahmad Ismail is a part of.

When i was in primary school, i was placed in a chinese school, my father believed in cultural integration, he believed that we had much to learn from our counterparts, and so he had tried to instill in me a certain amount of compromise. Now tell me, is there a difference with this situation compared to Chinese boys telling me to find another school because i wasnt chinese??? Telling me that i was lost for staying there... Where did these 8-9 year olds even learned these things if not from their parents??? I have been in the receiving end of racism so many times i remembered in high school wanting to play basketball i was forced to practice alone as the captain shouted in the beginning of training "Melayu practice belah sana, Cina di sini" and guess what? I was the only Malay. And i took that walk towards the other side of the world to play alone and I did.

Despite that, I have also met amazing individuals of different race that i have admired. A friend, a mentor, a lecturer, a basketball player, they too found acceptance.

I think Ahmad Ismails comments were blown way out of proportion. Had it come from a 16 year old teenager who refused to let a malay boy play basketball he would have been noted down as immature. But it doesnt make it any less significance. I have reacted well to racism always believing in humanity. but ask yourself this, what if Ahmad Ismail had been a victim of racism all his life? what if he was the boy transfered from the chinese school he had tried to learn in, to a malay school? what he was refused the right to play on a leveled playing field of a basketball court? What if he was the one graduate turned down by a Chinese company because he had to pray on fridays? What if he was fired because he went missing from the office for 15 minutes at 130pm 430pm and 715pm???? You want to tell me its not happening??

It is Malaysian mindset that we judge people quickly when we forget that only God has that right. What right do we have to judge him? and even if we do.. why pour oil on already burning fire?

The MALAYSIANS that i have known in my life are accepting, they accept the fact that we are different and how we react to certain events are different and how we have been brought up are different. Im not defending Ahmad Ismail, there was no excuse for he had said, but i refuse to be drawn to this mentality that is largely affected by politicians that he needs to be punished. God punishes you, not your fellow man.

I have sat with Chinese who lean close and whisper
"hey the chinese guys behind us are saying some bad things about you in chinese..."

I have sat with indian lecturers who say:
"Sometimes when all else fails hanafee... you turn to your God.... Im sure you'll feel a lot better..."

I have sat with Chinese friends who say
"Hey let me pay, you paid the last time we chatted"

I have met Chandra, Boon Han, Jeslyn, Huey Mei, Raj, Ai Huey, Swee Keng, Koh Yung Bing, Eldero Pan, Teo Yung Lun and they were all exceptional individuals.

But I have also met those who refused to even befriend me because i am Malay.

All im saying is that everyone has had their fair share of being treated as an outcast, victims of racism be it Chinese against Malays or vice versa. So we should all not be pulled into this web of hate spun by political leaders who believe making people hate Ahmad Ismail for what he said regardless of his past is the right thing to do. Because we all know its not the right thing to do.

Punish him and we would have proven those who already have hate in their hearts that they are right. We have better things to do then to dwell on what one man said. We have a country to fix an i have no time to dwell on trifles. Remember it was just one man. But punish him and you will see that he will have even more supporters just like Anwar.

p/s - Some NGO's Malay Based has already expressed their approval of Ahmad Ismail, be aware of this week when one of those NGO's start voicing out their opinions and their approval of Ahmad Ismail. When you shove one of the Malays, some will help him shove back. We'll see where it goes from there.

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

Mantera Beradu

My favorite song of the week.
Lirik best.

Banyak juga words yang tak faham
walaupun dalam bahasa melayu
kamus dewan bahasa & pustaka warna hijau tak ada pulak
teringat pula nasihat cikgu bahasa melayu aku
Cikgu Ujang, beliau ada suruh beli
tapi aku ini malas pula nak membeli
kenapa kamus bahasa inggeris boleh beli
tapi kamus bahasa melayu tak terbeli
konon dah pandai melayu sangat la tu
haish


Nah. liriknya. Hayatilah!

Masih belum sempurna..

Gerakkan Hati... Hati gerakkan...
Pandanglah aku.. aku lah dia..

kulitku tebal.. ku kebal.. ingatku kebal..
hanya berbual makan angin kembung perut mual...
resah dan tidak senang.. hidup tak pernah lenang..
ku schizo paranoia takut pecah tembelang

pecah tembelang... peta dah hilang...
bangau dah pulang... suara sumbang..

lidahku kaku tak selicin kuku
teman baikku buku
bini ku pena.. tak pernah lena
aku suka mengintai pantang ditenung
berakhir pertelingkahan dalaman
pasti belum

ikut gerak hati.. pena melayang
dilihat dua layang pandang
tak lah sekarang
takat meradang
tanya.. abang gedang, apa barang?
badan macam badang
main macam belakang parang

kuhunuskan keris musuh ada pistol
tradisi kekalkan adaptasi harus betul
tujuh baris keramat tujuh garis penamat
baik berpada biar jahat asal selamat

ramai saudaraku yang baik telah dipijak

awan mendung yang berarak
bawa tangis bawa resah
rebah rindu yang terkumpul
semua birat dan kalimah
semua janji yang terikat
lebur disisimu

yo ijazah terbaik datangnya dari jalanan
dari pengalaman bercakap dan bersalaman
konflik motivasi cuba medatasi
positif dan benci jadi inspirasi pagi

peduli itu interpretasi basi pekakkan sebelah
halang biar keduanya muka cantik
soalan bodoh yang ditanya jadi melodinya
lebih hina dari zina

lu bikin dosa ku bikin prosa
testosterone testarosa
citacita sosa kl kl kosa nostra
jalan berliku ku harung roller coaster
gah sentosa tiada penyesalan
luas pandangan jauh dah berjalan
tak sempurna masih ada kejanggalan
gagal merancang, merancang kegagalan

awan mendung yang berarak
bawa tangis bawa resah
rebah rindu yang terkumpul
semua birat dan kalimah
semua janji yang terikat
lebur disisimu

kucing bawa tidur rimau bawa igau
masuk tempat orang bawa otak bukan pisau

naik bukit angkuh cakap ayah jangan risau
turun bukit pucat dengar tiga miaww
kucing bawa tidur rimau bawa igau
masuk tempat orang bawa otak bukan pisau

tolak pintu gua tiga kerat tenaga
kosong tak dijaga sampai datang tiga naga
ingat nak berlaga tapi tak kan boleh menang
menang dengan otak tak mesti dengan pedang

sebelum jadi bangkai ikan koi renang renang
pura pura salah jawapan untuk naik berang
panggil lima kawan atau biar pergi laju
risaukan pekara remeh kita tak akan maju
muka sama hijau hati siapa tahu
merah dah menyala pasti mati siapa mahu
gagap tiga kali bercakap benar saja
bulan terang ramai yang keluar buat kerja

panjat pokok buluh cari tukun air terjun
naik sampai nampak dah terpegun turun
tiga ular ikut lompat atau paut
kalau lari mati jika jerut maut

awan mendung yang berarak
bawa tangis bawa resah
rebah rindu yang terkumpul
semua birat dan kalimah
semua janji yang terikat
lebur disisimu

puisi hati mu... hati mu puisi
palu hati ku palu hatiku

kulit tak besalin walau saling ganti baju
pandang sini pandang sini
ku berbahasa baku kata kata nahu
himpun jadi satu
mantera beradu dengan irama dan lagu

akhirnya sempurna....


p/s: tak tau nak letak gambar apa for this entry.

Tuesday, September 9, 2008

Childhood Memory


=D
Hehe.
Found this while tidying up my magical box
which i kept all my artsy staff and colorful papers.

Given by my childhood kawan karib
who happened to be the most popular girl in primary school

SKTR 1
God how I miss the school
and my childhood
and the girls
and the teachers

It's funny
though we are living in the same hometown
in the same Taman Rinting
we hardly find time to catch up with each other

Nasib baik kawan karib yang seorang ini
pandai buat blog
boleh keep in touch online
hehe