Monday, February 26, 2007

sleep tight

He only comes out late at night, just like a vampire in the moonlight. He wrapped up tight in mystery. He’s got her so fogged in... That she can’t even see. Her frens say she’s caught up in fairy tales, beautiful pain and dreams. And she confesses, with him it feels like real. Cos he’s a fantasy, no, he’s not just a fantasy, he’s darling to her. Does she really think she sees him in the moonlight? Really wanna hold him ‘because it feels right. Last night she swore she heard him call her name. Crawled through her window, took her hand and stole her away. Went to the drive-in, speeding like a runaway train. Woke up and smelled his scent in the morning rain. Woke up this morning, couldn’t get him out of her head. Really wanna see him tonight…Really wanna see you, sleep tight.

p/s: entry lama. =) hehe.


I am not sure what I want to write here. Whether bout the things that had happened for the past three days or heart matters. I read something this morning, it sounds sad. I was touched. I wasn’t hurt.

For my awesome, I loved you and I love you still. Remember the story that I told you? About a boy who played with a girl, while the other girl just watched from afar. She stayed. And so did I. I’ll be staying till you finish mending my broken heart. =) No. Kidding. I’ll be staying, right here, right there, never leave. Hmm? I love you.


Friday, February 16, 2007

Let me

Did I mention before that this is the place where I complain and yell out loud? Of course, you cannot hear me.

I know my responsibilities, when and how I conduct them. I work at my own pace. Be it fast or slow. I need my own time. I am well aware of deadlines. I control my time management. It is kind of you to remind me. I appreciate that. Oh, do not talk about time with me when you are not even punctual yourself. Look, who’s talking shit? If you think there is no progress, I would like to suggest you something. Wouldn’t it be nice if you take my responsibilities? Perhaps you love my glamorous post. What is it? International affair? Ambassador? I have never dreamt to get this post in my life okay. What makes you think I enjoy it?

Let me be irresponsible for once. Let me not taking everything seriously. Let me. *sighs*

Everything I did had its reason. Same goes to the thing I didn’t do. The message is there. Did or not. Do not say something that you do not know. It is okay to assume something. But please oh please stay optimistic. You do not know what has been happening at my home, in my shoes. I will not even care what you are going to say. I’ll take it. It may hurt but I can always grin later.

Hehe. Now that I have cooled down. The above paragraphs were written when I was in a mess. Do not take it seriously but if you insist to, I will not stop you. Oh and i forget, perhaps you do not even know the existence of this site. Herh. *smiles*

-Life at home. No color-

Tuesday, February 13, 2007


A certain man said to the priest Shunkagu, “The Lotus Sutra Sect’s character is not good because it’s so fearsome.” Shunkagu replied “It is by reason of its fearsome character that it is the Lotus Sutra Sect. if its character were not so, it would be a different sect altogether.” This is reasonable.


Some people said "The Sabrina character is not good because she's so fearsome, annoying, childish yet dominant." Then someone replied "It is by reason of those characters that she is the Sabrina. if her character were not so, she would be a different person altogether." haha. this is so reasonable. i like!!

weekends with "awesome"

Have u ever tried to find the words but they don’t come out right? Hmm…I am staring at notebook’s screen. I have so much to say but somehow I don’t know where to start. Last weekdays were tough for me. I was so happy to be able to unwind and spend my weekends with you like I wished for so long.

I don’t think I’m going to write the details of the weekends here as it would only attract curiosity and suspicious towards us. Herh. It was great start of my holidays. Thanks for spending your days and nights with me despite of you not having enough sleep. Thanks for the nice dinners, movies, secret recipe, Baskin n robin and also your kak nurul. She’s beautiful.

I’m sorry I couldn’t stop the tears. I’m sorry I treated you bad, minutes before you walked me away. I was so sad you couldn’t be with me till the last moment. It was hard letting you go too and even harder when u turned and walked back to me.

I know what kind of a jerk you can be and the feeling of your swords stabbing into my chest. And I hate it if I had to wait and pushed away again in the name of the responsibility. Coz honestly, I don think I can wait anymore and being hurt over and over again. I am so scared you might be the Mr. Nice Guy to them and I’m terrified I’m going to lose you again. And I don’t want to hear you telling me to find someone else anymore.

I “awesome” you so much and I need you. I don’t want another “awful” with me years from now. I want my “awesome”.

P/s: sorry it’s not a long entry like yours. I don’t know how to express my happiness. I just hope u know and understand how much I appreciate the moments we were together. *smiles*

Monday, February 5, 2007


imagine finding out that your heart is bigger than you ever thought,
imagine your affections are far deeper than you ever felt,
imagine you caring more than you ever thought possible

now imagine being on the receiving end...

words cannot even begin to describe it,
nor even come close to giving the feeling any justice

it is a gift,
and goodness me what a gift it is

to daddy/d'angel/diabolic_angel/secret-keeper/glow-giver,
for simply being the person that you are,
for giving me more than i could ever hope for,
and even more than you can ever imagine